This is a little number I finished a while ago, but couldn’t post until now. I was waiting on the images from Mr. Photographer. And now that I have them, so do you. I’m going to edit this post and add the pattern (for free) a little later today. I’m in a rush and have to get to the dentist by 9am. Nothing like squeaky clean teeth. Dirtay mouth? Clean it up!

ENVY

Photography: Atila Marquez

Styling: Rebecca Crea

Model: Channing Andreya

Makeup: Yuti

Pattern:

Materials

• US 13 needle, straight or circular
• 1 skein Burly Spun yarn in Lime Green
• Cable needle
• 3 large white buttons Style #35997 Size 60 L / 38 mm (purchase here)

Gauge:  4.5 sts = 2″ on US 13 in seed stitch

CO 20 sts.  Slip the first stitch of every row purlwise and knit the last st of every row to create selvedge edge.

RW 1:  Sl 1, p1, k4, p1, est seed st pattern - k,p,k,p x 6 sts, then p1, k4, p1, k1.

RW 2:  Sl 1, k1, p4, k1, seed st x 6 sts, k1, p4, k2.

RW 3:  as RW 1

RW 4:  as RW 2

RW 5:  Sl 1, p1, c4b, p1, 6 seed sts, p1, c4f, p1, k1.

RW 6:  as RW 2

Work RWS 1-6 until piece measures approx 23″, or until 13 cables have been worked.  Finish with RW 6.  Work 4 rws in all seed st, starting with sl1, k1, p1….

Next row (RS buttonholes) - Sl 1, k1, p1, BO next 2 sts, *p1, k1, p1, BO next 2 sts, rep from * once more ending with p1, k1.

Next row (WS) - Sl 1, p1, k1, *CO 2 [p1, k1] twice, rep from * ending with CO 2, p1, k2.

Return to seed stitch and work 3 more rows, then BO all stitches in pattern.

Wrap around your neck and mark where you want the buttons, keeping in mind where the button holes are.  And stay warm this summer, for pete’s sake.

Got something in the mail - thought I’d share with you. You know how when you order stuff, you’re a little anxious, because you never know exactly what you’re going to get? I mean, when I send a bill with a check inside, the electric company ALWAYS knows what they’re getting. But with hand dyed merino superwash roving - it’s a little different story. In fact, I was so happy with it, I’ve contemplated hurting my neck so I need a neck brace.

This is from Knitterly Things. It’s superwash merino roving in the Marigold colorway. And if she needs a testimonial - the shit was so soft, I was afraid the air would damage it. And I love extras. In the bag was some extra roving just to play with (for free). So yeah - I think they have a new customer.

I also just got a new art studio for, well, my art. I do a lot of nude figure work, and have been working with this one model for a little bit now. It all happened at the right time. And we’re very comfortable in the space. It’s in Tribeca, and I couldn’t be happier with it. I tried for the longest time to make do with my little “art space” in my apartment. But it’s not the same. And I’ve wanted a studio for a while. So. This is the outside of the building:

I’m very excited about this summer. It has no a/c, so I’m looking forward to working with my oils/the smell of turpentine/and the sweltering heat. No really, I am.

How does this relate to knitting? Not at all. I’m not knitting right now. I talked with a good friend of mine the other day, and she’s one of those people that you would use the quote on - “a friend is one who knows all about you and loves you just the same” - and I told her about the dilemma I sometimes have with knitting. I love to knit. That’s IT. I don’t like shit lying around after I’ve completed it. I don’t like extra yarn. I don’t like trying to perfectly coordinate handknitted with my “look” for the day. Sometimes they clash horribly, as a matter of fact. And that’s another reason why I love the studio (which I’ve affectionately named “The Hole”) because I’ve taken a break from the creating of knitting to the creating of raw art again. The next posting should be titled something like, “I’m knitting again, FINALLY”.

This is an inspired piece. FINALLY. Women of the Elizabethan period wore ruffles and such to show their status in society and to get noticed. I wanted to create a simple ruffled scarf to mimic the “ruffs” they would wear. I see a whole new direction coming on here. I’m happy about it, though - because it’s one of the few times I’m allowing myself to be inspired. Usually I bang my head into the wall to make ideas just pop out of nowhere. But the reality for me is, I have to train myself to see inspiration in more places. So this is a start. I’m excited. And so should you be - you’re getting another free pattern.

Status Symbol

Materials:

• Noro “Cashmere Island” yarn 60% wool/30% cashmere/10% nylon in Color 1 - 4 balls
• Size H crochet hook
• Size US 8 24″ circular needles
• tapestry needle

Gauge not important

Finished measurements (without ruffles) approx 5″x41″ unblocked

Body of scarf is crocheted chevron with garter stitch ruffles.

Pattern:

With size H crochet hook, ch 29.

Row one: skip 3 ch, 4 dc in next 4 ch, 3 dc in next ch, 5 dc in next 5 ch, skip 2 ch, 5 dc in next 5 ch, 3 dc in next ch, 5 dc in next 5 ch, ch 3, turn.

Row two: skip 1 st, 4 dc in next 4 sts, 3 dc in next st, 5 dc in next 5 sts, skip 2 sts, 5 dc in next 5 sts, 3 dc in next st, 5 dc in next 5 sts, (end with 4 dc, skip 1 dc, 1 dc in turning ch, ch 3, turn. Rep from Row 2.

Continue until you have used two balls of yarn, and fasten off.

Ruffles:

With size US 8 24″ circular needles, pick up 18 stitches across one end of scarf.

Next row, kfb of each stitch - 36 sts.

Next row, knit

Next row, kfb of each stitch - 72 sts.

Next row, knit

Next row, kfb of each stitch - 144 sts.

Knit 14 more rows in garter stitch and bind off. Repeat for other end of scarf.

Fierce.

I had to adjust to the fact that Adam doesn’t knit anymore. He machines. Now, he hasn’t spit out knitting like a baby does when there’s food in it’s mouth he/she doesn’t like. He might do a little here and there, but for the most part, he’s DONE. And when you can whip out a scarf out of “Elaine” (Schaefer, I think) lace weight in about 2 minutes, well, it’s all about the instant gratification. It was almost an other-worldly experience when we met up for coffee and he gave me the scarf. Lace weight? 1240 yards? Done???? I almost didn’t want to touch it.

It almost feels like cheating. When a lace weight project is supposed to take sooooo long, and it only takes 13 seconds, well. You know.

I also have an important piece of reference for everyone’s knitting reference books. If you are EVER in doubt as to why people say “light colored/simple yarn for lace” and “crazy hand dyed yarn for stockinette” - well here ya go.

I blurred the hand dyed example just to drive my point home. I know I’m not the first one to illustrate this point, but, you know. Feel free to use the above photos for your own needs. Everyone else does.

Thanks Adam, again.

So I just got back from vacation. It wasn’t a tropical-Pina Colada-half-naked-in-a-speedo kind of vacation, it was a sit-on-my-ass-and-knit vacation. I went to Indianapolis (where I’m from) and visited with my mom, my brother, his wife, my nephew, and the ONE friend there I care most about. I wanted isolation. I understand why people move to places like Portland, Oregon. Know any good apartments, Cari? My mom was all like, “oh, god - you live in New York City!! I’m so stressed out that you’re going to be bored!!” It’s really interesting that she would say that, because I use my time away from NYC to do NOTHING. It’s a welcomed blessing. The blankness. The open quiet air. The eye-bugging boredom.

So, on my ass I sat. And knitted. And knitted. And knitted.

All done.

This is the second sock in progress at 30,000 feet. Scout’s Swag fingering yarn in the Ballooney colorway. Love. Pure love. I have a feeling these socks will have holes in them very soon.

All done. The Chevron Scarf from Last Minute Knitted Gifts. I’m sorry, but if I had a few “last minutes” to whip up a gift for someone? This would NOT be it. Took FOREVER. And it’s not the most exciting knit. But who cares. Joelle rules. So does Purl Soho. Period.

Almost done. Some more Koigu socks. *yawn*

So yeah. I did a lot of “little” knitting too. Fingering weight. Nothing bulky. One of the highlights from my trip - the yarn store there. It EXPANDED since the last time I was home. And they just signed the lease for the space next door - so when I see them again, it will be even BIGGER. I can’t wait. Check them out. Their site isn’t much to look at, but you know. It’s like a boutique for yarn. But it’s not fancy and pretentious. They have EVERYTHING. I even picked up a skein of yarn that cost (are you sitting down?) $145.00. One skein. Handspun. It was pretty and all, but………. Oh, and by picked up, I just mean I picked it up to feel it. I didn’t pick it up as in purchasing.

I’m feeling the crunch to get all this knitting done because the non-knitting season is coming up. And I know if I let them sit there much longer, they’ll NEVER get done. At least until next winter when I no doubt will post something like, “Ahhh…I’m so glad winter is here, now I can knit again…”

Ok, so my name isn’t Steve. But, if Adam were single, I’d change my name in a heartbeat and have babies with him.

The machine-knitting world has always been a little, well, “machine-y” to me. I’ve never been able to get into it. I’ve seen people working the machines, etc, but it never appealed to me. UNTIL NOW. I spent the evening with my dear friend Adam last night and we had so-much-fun-oh-my-god-i’m-gonna-die. He’s a genius on the machine. We’ve been toying with the idea of collaborating with machine/handknit stuff for a minute, and I’ve been secretly wanting him to make all my sweaters and then tell everyone I handknit them. He makes me want to lie to people! That’s how good he is.

So, I showed up with some Malabrigo Lace. Perfect. See, my lazy ass would never knit a whole project from the stuff (more than likely), so I figured it’d be a great thing for the machine. Man. Little did we know. GORGEOUS. So we played.

And I even got a little machine-knitted gift. (I actually hinted HEAVILY that I loved it loved it loved it loved it, and he felt pressured into giving it to me.)

Thanks Adam. For everything.

So for all you people who have been DYING for a basic men’s hat pattern - I’ve got one for you. For free. (Like there’s a shortage of basic ANYTHING on the web) My friend owns a bar here in NYC and over the last few months, we’ve gotten to be good enough friends that we decided he should have something I knit for him. He’s straight. Damn. I’ll take a picture of him in it if he lets me, but for now, I’m going to have to do.

I know, you can’t see the stitches. Trust me - IT’S STOCKINETTE. It was more about me being arty than stitch definition. Oh, and the fag stripes are sold separately. The real one for Mr. StraightManIWishWasGay will be all black, more than likely.

BasicSimpleLazy

• Zara Yarn, 1 ball in black (might take a little of a second ball)
• US 5 16″ Circulars
• US 5 dpn’s
• one stitch marker

Gauge: 6sts & 8 rws = 1″ in St st on US 5

This hat uses scraps of 4 other colors of Zara, but just for the hell of it. You can make it all solid.

CO 108. Place marker and join in the round, being careful not to twist the stitches. Work K2P2 rib x 14 rnds. Or almost 2″. Change to St st and work until hat measures 5″ from CO edge.

Crown shaping:

Rnd 1: *Work right slanting dec (knit the first stitch, slide it to right needle. Purlwise, slide it back to left needle. Lift the second stitch from the end of the left needle up and over the just worked stitch you slid back, then slide the stitch back to the right needle), k23, ssk, rep from * ending round with ssk.

Rnd 2: knit.

Repeat last two rounds, working 2 less stitches between all decreases (first round will be right slant dec, k21, ssk, and so forth)

Work dec rounds until 52 sts remain, then transfer the remaining sts, 13 on each of 4 dpns. Cont working dec until 12 sts remain. Cut yarn and weave through remaining sts and fasten off.

I have a 24″ head (exactly), and this hat fits me like a glove. The ribbing on a US 5 is nice and springy and snug.

On another note - I had a photo shoot yesterday for a new scarf I designed. The pattern will be up very soon, and the images are on the way from the photographer. The model was gorgeous, the Makeup Artist was unbelievably good, and I love my photography friend (just beware - there’s some adult material)…..And then there’s Rebecca. She’s my stylist extraordinaire. Did ya’ll know she did that? So smart that girl. And I need her around me because I tend to do things like, “What about making her suck on a huge lollipop? Wouldn’t that be cute?” Um. No. “What about designing something like (…….) and making the model wear leather pants???” (glazed over look from Rebecca)… No, really. All that to say, she “smarts” my “vision”, and makes them look even better than the picture that was in my head. Often times, what I don’t realize is that those pictures are tainted with other surreal, disturbing images that should never come out. EEEEEEEEK.

Anyone watching the Oscars? I’m working. So to all you BITCHES that get to sit on your sofas and knit tonight. Think of me at least once. Bitches. I could rationalize my pain away and say I’m glad I have to work cuz I’m sick of watching Hollywood congratulate itself. Yeah, that’s it.

xoxo

You ever have one of those days that starts out REALLY wrong? Yesterday was all about my day off. And it was nerve-wracking. It started with my date from the night before leaving and me not knowing. I mean, of course I knew that he left, but I was left with not knowing. Should I say, “That was a really good time - let’s do it again soon” or should I say, “that was nice…..maybe we could keep in touch??” I hate that moment. I’m awkward in social situations, anyway. I’m usually worse in groups, though.

Then, my neighbors decided to start playing head-banger music (and commence to banging their heads on something) at 10 am. And it went on ALL DAY. I even got to the point where I knocked on their door to politely ask them to turn it down just a wee bit. It was vibrating my floors. They completely ignored me and never came to the door.

Enter knitting.

It’s funny how knitting can become such a good friend. You know, like the one who knows what you need to calm you down before YOU do. The one friend that knows everything about you and loves you just the same. The one that hears all the weird shit you say while you’re mumbling to yourself during stockinette. (please don’t tell me I’m the only one who does that.) So for some reason (knitting knows why) I paced the floor angrily for a few minutes, and at the moment where I thought I’d lose complete control and call the police, I ran to my stash with a glazed-over look and begged it for some help. And it delivered with a “Weren’t you supposed to make a simple, easy, calming ribbed hat for that friend of yours at the bar?” “Out of this leftover black Zara?”

CO 108.

Bliss out.

So today isn’t starting off the same way. I’ve already had three things that have made me smile. And smile big.

One:

I opened my box of Cheerios and this little guy was waiting for me inside. I gasped like you do on Christmas morning when you open something that takes your breath away. When you’re 4.  I used to collect Matchbox cars when I was little.  I thought I was SO fancy.

Two:

A rockin’ snowfall. FINALLY.

Three:

I didn’t realize I had this shot until looking for shots on my camera that I just took. This little gem was still there. She rocks. (sometimes literally - with a band!) And she’s soon to be Dr. Pam. She’s wicked cool.

Hope your day makes you smile……………………..

xoxo

I have been a neglectful blogger lately. Mostly because I want this to really just be all about knitting. And if I don’t have anything knit to say, I’d rather not say anything at all.

BUT! There’s some exciting things in the works. I can show you some, but some I can’t. Just trust me. I have a photo shoot on Saturday, 2/23 - and then one little tidbit can be revealed. A free one, at that.

This I can show you:

It the Russian Coat from VK Holiday ‘07 in progress. It’s the one I’m making for a complete stranger. It’s kinda cool how it comes together. I’m even further/farther along than this photo suggests. It’s starting to feel like knitting an afghan, though. Big. So - to its future owner - just remember. Since it’s one size - probably pinned like crazy on the model in the photo - and I don’t have your measurements…..be ready for anything. I know I am.

Speaking of ready for anything - can I just TELL you how geeked I am about seeing the final kids’ designs on Project Runway??? Is anyone else as addicted to that show as I am? I seriously sit on my sofa and knit during all the episodes. (and fantasize about being a “designer”) And since I’m usually off work on Wednesdays, it’s perfect. And by all the episodes, I mean - I go to the market to get food for the night (usually munchies) and start with like 3 or 4 episodes back. I swear I see something I missed the first 8 times I watched them. Plus, I like seeing all the people I hate being kicked off again. Yeah! Hit ‘em again! Ha. I’m horrible.

Happy Valentine’s all.

You know, I’ve been put through the ringer for “designs” before. I’ve been laughed at. I’ve been the subject of jokes. (and a couple of them weren’t even MY bright ideas) And at the end of the day, I’m just glad it gave people something to talk about. Cuz when people talk about you, that means you have something to offer them that they need. Otherwise, they wouldn’t bother. And through it all, I think I’ve gotten better at just letting people say what they want. It used to really bother me. Very recently on stumbleupon.com someone said something like, “…..oh, yeah, I’d wear that, if I wanted to look reTARded!” (talking about this) What do comments like that even mean? So, it all boils down to the fact that people can say what they want. They have a right. As do I. As does everyone. (that’s the best sentence I’ve ever said - as does everyone…wtf?) It’s that whole ‘life is 99% your reactions to things that happen’ …. I think I just butchered that. Whatever.

Speaking of butchering things - I don’t have a vagina (yet) but I cannot IMAGINE what one must feel like wearing these:

Mohair pants? I mean. Wow.

I’d love to see this chick walk on the catwalk.